Editor's Note: Window on the Clearwater has joined the Wednesday's Child network to help spread the word about children that are waiting for families to give them the loving care that they need. Each Wednesday we will profile a different child. For more information about Wednesday's Child and how you can be involved check the web site at: http://www.idahowednesdayschild.org/.
"Hi. I like to be called Tom. What I really need in a family is someone who would take care of me and really likes me. I want a mom or a dad who won't give up on me when I'm having a bad day. I've had a lot of changes in my life, and I need someone who will stay.
I hope my adoptive family loves big dogs and animals like I do. I really want a dog of my own. Someday I want to be a veterinarian.
I like playing Sorry, Uno and other games. I like playing with my friends."
Tom enjoys staying busy whether it is playing outside with his buddies, playing a video game or going out to dinner. He has great manners and can be very enduring. Tom is most comfortable when he is around animals. He is very gentle and kind to animals which has been a very healing coping skill for Tom. Tom does best when he is in a family who has pets or farm animals. He loves all animals and enjoys sharing the responsibilities of caring for them. He would love to have a pet of his own someday and even dreams of being a veterinarian!
Tom is a teen who is in need of a loving home and a family who will not give up on him. Tom needs positive role models and a family who is supportive and understanding of Tom's needs. Tom's family will need to help Tom through challenges and be there to celebrate his accomplishments.
Described as kindhearted, forgiving and very talkative, Tom gets along well with most adults and peers. He's a charming child who seeks approval; an endearing trait that tends to mask challenges related to Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD). If his adoptive family is to help him succeed, they must be realistic about the focused psychological support he may need into adulthood. SSI payments will help with extra community resources and the activities that build Tom's self-esteem. Most of all, he will respond to daily "belonging" reassurances and acceptance of who he is now rather than folks who expect love to conquer all. If you are secure in your own world, Tom's endearing ways will be reward indeed for the extra commitment that's required.
Tom is learning how to build social skills and personal boundaries that help with the complexities of friendships. He tells us he would enjoy having older brothers or sisters as mentors as he learns those skills. He would also do well as an only child with lots of attention. Single and non-traditional moms and dads with exceptional parenting talent will be considered by Tom's adoption caseworker, as will a traditional mom-and-dad team. Pets would be a plus for this tender-hearted boy who has dreams for a future with a family. ??Tom is in a therapeutic level foster home currently and is adapting reasonably well.
Tom has experienced disappointments when it comes to finding an enduring family--a concept he is finding it tough to believe in. He does have periods where he excels in the home and school for a long period of time. When he becomes comfortable in the setting, he begins testing the limits to see how secure his environment is. This is a survival skill Tom has learned and is also a large piece of his RAD diagnosis. His adoption team will be looking for a family with above-average skills and a firm grasp of attachment issues. He needs a single individual or couple with a predictable daily routine and lots of creativity in modeling social skills. Watching this young man complete the developmental tasks that lie before every teen will be very rewarding for the right adoptive parent(s).
Portrait by Cindy Sherman Photography
To find out more about Shanyia, adoption or becoming a foster parent, email the Idaho CareLine or call 1-800-926-2588. You may be asked to provide this reference number: 30201.
|Window on the Clearwater
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