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Editor's Note: Window on the Clearwater has joined the Wednesday's Child network to help spread the word about children that are waiting for families to give them the loving care that they need. Each Wednesday we will profile a different child. For more information about Wednesday's Child and how you can be involved check the web site at: http://www.idahowednesdayschild.org/.

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Ebony

Ages: 13

"Hi, I'm Ebony. I like school, especially Math and Reading. I kinda like English, but it's a little hard for me. And I like soccer and all kinds of sports.

I'm in the popularity group at school. To belong to that, you have to dress appropriately, straighten your hair, walk and talk at the same time and when people are rude to you, you have to be a little saucy! And you have to be a good person.

Once I grow up, I would like to go to Disneyland with my husband and kids. And I would like to go to college, maybe College of Southern Idaho near where my sister lives. I want to be a nurse or a doctor someday.

When it comes to a family, I want really normal non-perverse people who protect their children. I would like to be an only child, but I could also do well in a family where there are older brothers or sisters. I get along well with foster children, but I need the attention and effort of being the only adopted child.

I look forward to shopping and doing arts and crafts projects with a mom, because I'm very artistic and creative. I want to be able to talk to her about my feelings. I would like to do hiking, camping and outdoor things with a dad. And sports, because I'm very athletic.

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Ebony is clear about what she thinks families should be all about. "A family would let me know they care about me by saying 'I love you.' Families should treat each other equally and help each other with hard problems." She also feels that a family should respect her right to privacy regarding her birth family. Ebony says she is OK with a mom and a dad, two moms or a single mom.

Ebony needs a calming, no nonsense parenting style. According to her foster mom, when upset, Ebony needs a parent who can "bring her down" and not jump into the "soup" with her.

Although Ebony likes "bling," her foster mom says she needs a family who understands it can't be about "stuff." She describes Ebony as possessing a great sense of humor and "usually pretty upbeat." She says that even Ebony's "down swings" are short lived, and she can be eased out of them with the question "Are you going to pout all day?" Ebony's foster mom adds, "It may take time to build her trust, but she is very capable of bonding."

Because Ebony has already experienced sharp disappointments in her young life, she may appear to have a tough exterior. With patience and caring, that soon gives way to a sensitive child - one who responds to attention, instruction and sincere praise. When Ebony shares her opinions, she needs parents who listen and teach through friendly, inquisitive dialogue and practical reasoning rather than through an authoritarian approach. At the heart of her bravado is a child who wants to be accepted and liked. It may take time to convince her that adoption means no more moves. Her parent(s) can do it by sticking by her and working through occasional challenges. Ebony's affection and each funny moment will be cherished long after she's become an independent young woman.

Portraits by Pomerelle Portrait Design Studios

To find out more about Ebony, call the Idaho CareLine number, 1-800-926-2588. In Idaho you can dial 2-1-1. You may be asked to provide this reference number: 30268.

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Window on the Clearwater
P.O. Box 2444
Orofino, ID 83544
208-476-0733
Fax: 208-476-3407
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