Editor's Note: Window on the Clearwater has joined the Wednesday's Child network to help spread the word about children that are waiting for families to give them the loving care that they need. Each Wednesday we will profile a different child. For more information about Wednesday's Child and how you can be involved check the web site at: http://www.idahowednesdayschild.org/.
Wesley is extremely intelligent, funny, athletic, talented and has a protective side that reaches out to those who are considered the underdogs. He can be very gentle and fun with children and enjoys being around them. One of his more immediate dream jobs would be working with kids in a jump house or with junior gymnastics. Later, when he's finished with school, he might like to become an underwater welder. Could your family be the support he needs right now to achieve these dreams?
"Hi, I'm Wesley. I'm interested in gymnastics, free running, and breakdancing. My needs are pretty simple--clothes, food and a phone. I'm good with children, pets, chores. I'd like a family that's caring, but not overprotective. I haven't had a lot of freedom and I look forward to that.
There are other things I want, like a car, but that's not a need and I'm willing to earn it.
I'd like a dad that's somebody I could relate to--a little like me--funny, nice, likes to work together on projects like cars. I'd like a mother who could help me with homework, be supportive when I'm down, talk to me about girls.
I'm respectful, loving, laughing, and I care about every one. I like showing that I can be a good person. I don't really care for chores, but I do them because they need to be shared in a family. I like a family that does things together once in a while."
Wesley can be kind, respectful and follow the rules when they are fair and make sense to him. He does need adults who understand his need for alone-time in his room to call his friends, listen to his music, practice his dance moves, etc. Like most teenagers, he pushes boundaries, but he also responds positively to those who notice and encourage his abilities. During hard days when emotions run high, or when Wesley seems to shut off communication, it works best to give him time to regulate strong emotions rather than pushing for an immediate solution to a conflict. His case manager says he often comes to her with an apology for something said in the heat of the moment. He needs adults who are willing to forgive easily and not carry grudges.
Wesley loves most sports: football, basketball, soccer, etc. Although he may seem like he's pretty self-sufficient, and even like he doesn't need engaged parents, attendance at his sports events and an interest in his accomplishments will go a long way towards deepening his trust. Wesley is working hard in therapy to prepare for living in an adoptive or guardian family--very soon. His goal is to be able to get his first part-time job in 2016 so he can earn the things that are important to him.
Wesley wants a family that is invested in his future, but is also able to give him lots of time to bond. He's been disappointed a few times by folks who either expected too much too soon or didn't understand past traumas or how they affected his emotions or reactions. His adoption team is looking for a physically active one or two-parent family that has experience with trauma or is willing to learn effective parenting strategies. Having one at-home parent who can support Wesley at school and with accessing community resources would be ideal.
According to Wesley's case manager, the hard things he's survived have built a resilience and determination in him that could be absolute strengths, if only he had flexible parent(s) who can set aside a need for your love to be returned and give Wesley time to trust that you won't give up on him.
These next few years will be a time for Wesley to hone self-regulation abilities, develop social skills, and establish a good work ethic. Wesley wants parents who teach by example and allow him to make many decisions for himself. He learns well by trial and success--or error.
Portrait by Barb from Barb Bergeson Studio Gallery
To find out more about Wesley, adoption or becoming a foster parent, email the Idaho CareLine (Please include your zip code and city.) or call 1-800-926-2588. You may be asked to provide this reference number: 30571.
|Window on the Clearwater
P.O. Box 2444
Orofino, ID 83544